Judy Blore, a bereavement expert, in her article, “How to Help a Grieving Child” says,
“Grief is an agony for anyone, any age, any maturity, any faith. Grief takes time. It is a process of letting go of something familiar and taking hold of something in the future.”
Have you ever considered the child of divorce or separating cohabitating parents as being in agony? Judy also says,
“Children will generally exhibit one of three behavioral responses to changes in their lives: they will act out, withdraw, or become the responsible manager of the family. Many, including myself, think that the third option is the most dangerous.”
The same thing can be said about the child of divorce, and I agree with Judy on the third option. For the child with splitting parents who has to take on the role of manager of the family, it only gets worse with time as one or both parents start to date. Now the “manager” tries to protect younger siblings, or they might become the confidant or best friend of the parent, a role that is too much of a burden on young souls.