Family

Before there was a Hope 4 Hurting Kids, we were helping kids from divorced homes and other types of modern families under the names Divorce Ministry 4 Kids and I Am A Child of Divorce. While the number and types of kids and teens that we help has expanded, our commitment and passion for helping kids who have experienced the loss of family disruption has not. Here you will find the vast (and expanding) library of information and resources dedicated to all sorts of modern families and other family issues. If you want to limit your search to one area, please click on one of the options below.

Collections
Why Collections Are Important to Children of Divorce
All kids like to collect things. Rocks, bugs, jewels, stamps, coins and other small items become important to children. Sometimes the items are silly fun things while other times there might be a purpose to the art of collecting certain items. Some children turn their collections into a hobby. Boys who collect baseball cards or other sport memorabilia are a good example of collecting as a hobby. Children of various ages collect all kinds of items. My five-year-old grandson is into collecting “rocks” right now. What he calls rocks are actually glass jewels I put in my aquarium but to ...
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Unseen Side of Parenting
The Unseen Side of Parenting in a Divorced Home
We all know there are many issues a single parent has to deal with in a divorced home. However, there is also an unseen side of parenting alone and living in a single parent home. A friend of mine dealt with one of these unseen circumstances this week. Since it is the beginning of summer, it is time for her daughter to visit her other parent. This is just like thousands of kids are going to do this summer. However, right before time to leave, her daughter got sick. Her daughter wanted to stay home and be in her own ...
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Co-Parenting the Divorce Way
Co-Parenting the Divorce Way
Co-parenting is becoming the norm for divorcing couples and couples who are involved in cohabitation situations. But what exactly is co-parenting? Co-parenting the divorce way is when separating couples request the courts award legal joint custody of minor children. The marriage or relationship has ended, but the family still exists. If both parents get along, then co-parenting works. If the adults can’t get along, can’t agree or are hostile to one another, co-parenting is difficult to say the least. Good co-parenting takes teamwork. In her book, “Co-Parenting Works,” Tammy Daughtry breaks co-parenting into three models: 1. Conflicted co-parenting is a ...
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Co-Parenting That Hurts
Co-Parenting That Hurts Kids
Co-parenting among divorcing couples is becoming more popular. For many children this is a good thing. This means they get to have both parents making life-long decisions for their welfare. It means children can still have family connections with both sides of the family. If both parents can put aside their squabbles and think about what is best for their children, then co-parenting is a good option. If parents can keep conflict to a minimum and not inflict adult conflict on the kids then co-parenting might benefit the children. When family can be held to a high standard for all ...
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Effect of Divorce
The Effect of Divorce on Teens and Young Adults
Too many times people think that divorce doesn't have much of an impact on teens and young adults.  "The Effect of Divorce on Teens and Young Adults" from The Independent contradicts that notion. Here is an excerpt from the article: Ten years ago, if anyone had told me they were postponing divorce "till the children are older" I'd have thought their words made perfect sense. Back then, my children were one, five, eight and 10. I wouldn't have been able to imagine the effect on them of hearing that their father and I were splitting up. Whose house would they ...
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Long Distant Parent
The Kids Are Here Again! (Long Distant Parent)
The other day I was walking along the beach in the early morning when I happened upon a dad and son. The little boy, who appeared to be about 4, was frolicking in the waves and splashing water everywhere. I could tell as I approached the scene what was going on. I’ve seen it so many times before. Probably because we live in Florida, where there are nice beaches and a lot of fun activities to do with children, we have a lot of parents bring their children here for a fun time. I can usually spot a single long ...
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Helping Teens
Helping Teens Deal With Divorce (KidsHealth.org)
"Helping Teens Deal With Divorce" from the TeensHealth portion of KidHealth.org helps teens with various issues related to the divorce of parents.  It is packed with useful tips and information for teens going through the divorce of their parents.  It covers topics including: Why are my parents divorcing? Dealing with guilt and other emotions. Life changes that come with divorce. Ideas for making the divorce process easier. Possible positive things that can come from divorce. LINK: http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/Parents/divorce.html ...
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Power of Encouragement
The Power of Encouragement and Children of Divorce
Have you ever thought about the power of encouragement? Most of us try to encourage children that come to our church. We do this because maybe we want to build confidence within the child. We want to promote a relationship with the child so we can help them eventually foster a relationship with Jesus Christ. We want to stimulate them spiritually so they will learn how to develop a life of faith. We want them to keep them coming back to church. Encouragement has a lot of power for the child of divorce, particularly if the parents are still in ...
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School
How to Make School Your Child’s Ally After Divorce
Returning to school after their parents’ have separated or divorced can be difficult for any child. You can ease the transition, however, by opening the door to the many resources available to you through the school. The key here is in forming a cooperative relationship with key personnel. Making your child’s teachers aware of a major change in your home environment is helpful both for them and your child. That’s because school is really a second home for children in our culture. Regardless of their age, children can’t be expected to turn off their emotions during or after a divorce ...
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Encourage Children of Divorce
How To Encourage Children of Divorce
Many children’s leaders actually end up discouraging the very children we want to encourage and should be encouraging. Our conversations can set the stage for discouragement by how we approach a subject or by the very words we use. When children are discouraged their fears are stirred up and their sense of failure becomes paramount in their minds. Kids who are fresh in the divorce experience may already feel a sense of failure. They may think the reason a parent left is because they weren’t good enough and they begin to measure everything they do by this plumb line. Karen ...
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Adjust to Divorce
Helping Parents and Teens Adjust to Divorce
The teen years can be a particularly hard time for children to experience the divorce of their parents.  "Helping Parents and Teens Adjust to Divorce" from Risa Garcon explains why and offers some practical advice to both parents and teens. Here is an excerpt from the article: Divorced parents of teens often wonder if their children’s behavior and family relationship challenges are due to simply being a teen or due to the separation or divorce. A simple answer is that it may be both. A more honest answer suggests that it will depend on both the parent and the child ...
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Being Intentional
The Power of Being Intentional
Many children’s church workers and volunteers fall into ministering to the child of divorce. What do I mean by that? These kids show up at your church, and before you know it you are trying to figure out how to minister to them. You are usually doing it on the spot and you might not feel very confident in your ability to impact this child. You want to help them. You know you should help them. You want to bring the love of Jesus to these kids. You understand what the Bible says about the orphans. So you fall into ...
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