Family

Before there was a Hope 4 Hurting Kids, we were helping kids from divorced homes and other types of modern families under the names Divorce Ministry 4 Kids and I Am A Child of Divorce. While the number and types of kids and teens that we help has expanded, our commitment and passion for helping kids who have experienced the loss of family disruption has not. Here you will find the vast (and expanding) library of information and resources dedicated to all sorts of modern families and other family issues. If you want to limit your search to one area, please click on one of the options below.

Families Change
Families Change – Teen Guide to Separation and Divorce
Families Change is a site from the Justice Education Society in British Columbia. It is a guide for teens to parental separation and divorce. Written on a teen level it deals with what is happening, changes, emotions, strategies, the law, and frequently asked questions. The website is also available in French. Families Change explains why it exists: Separation and divorce have a profound impact on all family members. Loss of security is often coupled with intense feelings of grief. The stress can be overwhelming for kids, teens and parents. Within each section, various issues facing teens whose parents are separated ...
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discipline answers
10 Discipline Answers to Share with the Single Parents in Your Church
Single parents come to me all the time asking for help in disciplining their children. Remember they are parenting alone and there is no one in the house with them late at night or on a day-to-day basis to help them parent their children. It can get overwhelming to say the least. Here are ten examples of some of the kinds of questions I get about parenting alone. Sometimes single parents need a more in-depth answer depending on variations such as age, developmental abilities or other situations. For our purposes here these answers are short and to the point. Please ...
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Children Benefit from the Divorce
Do Children Benefit from the Divorce of Their Parents?
In speaking to parents, one thing we hear over and over is something to the effect of, "I really think my children benefit from the divorce because..." In 2013, HuffPost Divorce asked the following on Facebook and Twitter: "We want to know: What's one way your child has actually benefited from your divorce?" They have compiled SOME of the responses (the positive ones) and published them in an article titled Divorce And Children: 30 Ways Readers Say Their Children Benefited From Divorce.  Many of the replies focus on how much better off the kids must be because the parents are ...
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grudge
Parents Can You Let Go Of Grudges After Divorce?
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Gandhi Divorce can be a major stumbling block to our happiness and personal growth. Holding grudges and resentments have been proven to be harmful to your physical health and emotional well-being. Forgiveness is a productive way to move forward, detach from the past and let go of lingering hurts so you can experience a healthier, more promising future. It is not uncommon to resent the people closest to us because they have often done us some harm such as violating our trust through a lie, betrayal, deceit or ...
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Sowing Tears
Sowing Tears and Reaping Joy
Divorce is hard. There is no doubt about it. When parents divorce, kids will mourn the loss of their intact family, the loss of time and availability of one or both parents and the loss of life as they had know it. Divorce hurts, and kids suffer – most often they suffer more than even their parents who are getting divorced. But, there is hope. Things can get better, and though life will never be the same, it is possible to create a new normal. Psalm 126 is a Psalm of new beginnings. It recounts times in the past where ...
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Helping Children Deal With Divorce
Activities for Helping Children Deal With Divorce (MU Extension)
From MU Extension at the University of Missouri-Columbia, "Activities for Helping Children Deal With Divorce" suggests a multitude of activities that parents can do with their children to “help them work through their feelings, concerns and frustrations regarding the divorce.”  Though specifically designed for parents, these activities can generally be done by any caring adult with a child of divorce. By way of introduction, the article explains: The process of divorce is a challenging life transition for both parents and children. During a divorce, children often feel a variety of conflicting emotions. Parents should provide their children with understanding and ...
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Even More Mistakes We've Made
Even More Mistakes We’ve Made With Children of Divorce
This week we conclude our discussion of the mistake we’ve made when working with the child of divorce and their out of control behaviors. Mistake #6 – Time Out We sent kids to time out to “think about what they had done”. Here’s probably what really happened during that time. Teacher: Gage you go to time out. And you think about what you did. Gage’s self talk: Sure I’ll think about hitting that girl, and I’m gonna think about hitting again tomorrow too. She took my blocks when you weren’t looking so tomorrow I’m gonna hit her again when you’re ...
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Memories
Three Kinds of Memories
Talk about memories - today is my youngest son Nathan’s eleventh birthday. I wrote this article on his fifth birthday. I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday. Of my four kids, he is the only one born after I received Christ (something I did shortly after his older sister was born), and I marveled at the grace of God in my life and in that moment. The room was filled with his mother, of course, me, my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law and various well wishers as the day went on. Shortly after Nathan was born, a family ...
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Fatherless Daughters
Why Promiscuity is a Form of Self-Mutilation for Fatherless Daughters
Link to "Why Promiscuity is a Form of Self-Mutilation for Fatherless Daughters:" http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/16/daddyless-daughters-promiscuity-self-mutilation_n_3600946.html?ref=politics&ir=Divorce Fatherlessness is an epidemic in our world today. Too frequently, daughters who never knew their father or lose their fathers to divorce turn to a string of men to try to fill that void in their lives.  In this article, they discuss how this promiscuity is actually a form of self-mutilation.  Make sure to watch the video that goes along with the article ...
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Tell The Kids
How Should I Tell The Kids We’re Getting a Divorce?
STOP! If you are considering a divorce, do everything within your power to find another way. Divorce hurts. It will hurt your children whether or not they are willing to tell you. Divorce fundamentally changes the world they have come to know. That said, we recognize that some people will still elect to get a divorce, or may find themselves in a position where they have no choice. In those situations, we hope that you will make every effort to lessen the impact divorce will have on your kids. Those efforts should start from the very beginning, and in this ...
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More Mistakes We've Made
More Mistakes We’ve Made With Children of Divorce
Last week we looked at the mistakes we have made when working with children from divorced homes that have out of control behaviors. This week we continue exploring mistakes of the past. Mistake #3 – Everything Was Based On How the Adult Felt If the teacher felt happy then all was good. Oh my goodness, do you remember the happy face/sad face signs? I am so embarrassed to share this but, since I want you to explore your mistakes, I’ll share some of my worst ones. I very clearly remember one incident. We had paper plate hanging on a chair ...
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Early Intervention
Early Intervention
Are there other moms out there who have been blessed by your state’s Early Intervention program? Google tells me this service has all kinds of names across the country: Help Me Grow, Baby Net, Birth to Three, Infants & Toddlers, Early Steps, First Connections, Babies Can’t Wait. This service in Pennsylvania has been awesome for us as foster parents. We've had three different "types" of therapists over the last three years—physical therapy (PT), speech therapy, and occupational therapy (OT). (By the way, in case you’re unfamiliar—like I was—Occupational therapy, according to kidshealth.org, helps kids with various needs improve their cognitive, ...
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