Children of divorce suffer many consequences because of the divorce of their parents (legacies of divorce). Many legacies of divorce can cause immediate problems for some children. Other legacies impact the child of divorce for years to come. While some children seem to breeze through the divorce of their parents with no lasting impact at the time the divorce occurs, many will find themselves wrestling with various consequences later on in life and throughout their adult years.

Several researchers divide the legacies of divorce into two different time frames. Short-term legacy is the term used to define the consequences that affect the child at the time the divorce occurs and immediately following. Long-term legacy represents those consequences that impact the child of divorce later on in their teen or adult years.

Not every child of divorce will personally experience every short-term or long-term legacy. Much depends on the child’s support system, the child’s personality, the relationship with both parents, how the child is told about the divorce, how the parents experience the divorce individually, and the relationship, actions and attitudes of the parents after the divorce occurs.

There are a number of short-term legacy effects that you might see in children of divorce. In this article, we will examine 9 different short-term legacy effects. Continue reading

When you work with kids who are hurting from any variety of circumstances, it is important to know when you are in “over your head” and when you need to seek professional help for the child.

Know your limitations

For those us who are passionate about helping kids and/or who have worked with kids for some time, we sometimes want to do it all ourselves to make sure that child we are working with is helped. It’s easy to lose site of the fact that sometimes our ability and skills just aren’t enough. If we really want to help these kids, we need to be able to recognize when we need to get a Professional Counselor, Psychologist or Psychiatrist involved.

If you work closely with kids, there will be times when you will need to be prepared to refer a child to a professional. You should be prepared for this eventuality by compiling and keeping a list of Christian Counselor and other professionals in your area that you can refer kids (and their families) to.

Know the Signs that Professional Help May Be Needed

If a child your are working with exhibits any of the following signs consistently, you should consider the need to refer to another professional: Continue reading

One of our goals at Hope 4 Hurting Kids is to find very practical ways to serve hurting kids and their families. For us, it is not enough to just speak or write generally about children who are hurting; we want to serve those children directly, and their families. We also seek to serve those who work with hurting children. One very effective means and practical way that we can serve these kids and this community is through prayer.

James 5:13-16 tells us:

¹³ Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. ¹⁴ Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. ¹⁵ And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. ¹⁶ Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

Prayer is important, and it is something that God calls us to do for one another. There are so many verses in the Bible dealing with prayer that I can’t possibly include them all here, but I do want to share a couple:

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Dale Hudson offers up background information on foster kids and ideas on how to minister to them in a church situation in his article How To Minister to Foster Kids in Your Church (from Relevant Kids Ministry).

Ideas for Further Discussion About Foster Families

• How many foster kids are there in your community?
• Are there foster kids in your church? How do you know?
• Do you understand how the foster system works?
• What do you do for the foster kids and families in your church and community?
• Are there things you should you be doing that you aren’t?
• What’s worked for you and what hasn’t?

Scripture includes the revelation of God, and as such it guides and forms our view of all things – including divorce. Too many churches and ministries avoid this topic for fear of the backlash from their congregations. It is time that we, as the Church, stood up in love and took a position on this issue.

Before we get into the scriptural passages about divorce, I want to say a couple of words of Hope 4 Hurting Kids. Our primary focus when it comes to divorce is not on the cause of the divorce or the classification of divorce but on the outcomes of that divorce when it comes to the millions of children who go through their parents’ divorce.

Whether you agree with the position set forth below, or hold some other view, the fact of the matter is that for children the divorce of their parents is a stressful, traumatic and life changing event. We should not, and cannot, let our views on divorce itself keep us from working together to help the children of divorce.  Nonetheless, we do believe that God is our ultimate guide, and He has chosen to provide us with insight into divorce within scripture.

With that caveat, here is what we believe the Bible teaches about divorce. We have included scripture references for your review: Continue reading

I love working in children’s ministry.  God has blessed me with the opportunity to tell young children about Him. That is one the greatest blessings He has ever bestowed on me. Leading a small group of children is one of my favorite things to do in children’s ministry.  I love to talk to, interact with, disciple and to dig into the Word of God with them.  I love to build relationships with them, and I believe that God has gifted me in this area.  I have been privileged to experience many joyous and significant moments through my work with children. However, there have also been moments which have broken my heart and sent me to my knees in prayer.

I will never forget one particular Sunday afternoon when I was leading a group of kindergarteners and first graders.  We had worked through all of the small group activities for that particular weekend, and I was taking advantage of the extra time to get them know them all a little bit better.  We were talking about the usual suspects – pets, siblings, school, friends, etc.  I was asking some questions to try to get them talking, and we started talking about what each of them had done that weekend.  I asked the typical questions.  Had they done anything fun?  Did they spend the day with their Mom and Dad? Did they play with their pets?

As we went around the table, each child shared how they had spent their weekend thus far.  Then, I it came time for one little girl to share what she had done that weekend:

We spent yesterday packing up the house in boxes.

Being just a little naïve, and not realizing what was coming next,  I pressed a little harder,

Oh, are you moving?  Where are you moving to?  We’re going to miss you if you move far away.

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